Seattle, WA — (AP) In honor of the upcoming Half Black History Month, coffee giant Starbucks has announced plans to add a new beverage to their distinctive menu. The Mulatte™ is a combination blend of rich mocha coffee and creamy vanilla milk, designed to satisfy the mixed palates of its less discriminating customers. "Actually, the inspiration for this menu addition was an effort to simplify the ordering process for coffee drinkers of today." said Starbucks spokesperson Patrice Etter. "Instead of ordering a half-caf, half-decaf, half-fat, half-skinny, half-mocha, half-vanilla grande latte, you now have the simpler option of ordering a Mulatte™"
"Most people like their Mulattes™ hot and steamy, but I'm sure there's a few folks out there who would prefer them to be on ice." Etter continued. "But we're not concerned about differences of opinion. We'll tolerate anyone who wants to adulterate the dark exotic taste of mocha and the milky blandness of vanilla."
Starbucks plans a larger media blitz, mostly in metro areas around the country in the next few weeks. Negotiations with Nicole Richie to become the official beverage spokesperson are ongoing.
