COLUMBUS, OH – Area
marketing guy John Keith, 52, went to work yesterday with the flu, like an
asshole, infecting co-workers within a 12-foot radius who'd yet to be
immunized from this year’s strain.
You may have seen Mr. Keith
in a YouTube video yesterday, at press time up to 4 million views, vomiting in
a corridor outside a conference room, losing his balance, launching a stack of
papers into the air while spraying the glass walls of a nearby conference room
with stomach bile, until ultimately cracking his skull on the slick hardwood to
unconsciousness.
The whole incident was
captured on film by inoculated coworker Michael Johnson.
“I was messing around with
my new phone, shooting video, when John staggered into frame.” Johnson
explained. “It was about 2 o’clock, so I thought maybe he was drunk. 30 seconds
later—comedy gold!”
Keith is expected to be out
the rest of the week with the flu and a concussion.
