Columbus, OH - Recently separated twins, Andrew and Frank Johnson, 54, are pointing what could pass for fingers and a couple grotesque nubs at one other in a heated battle over which sibling got the short end of the stick—as far as limbs and organs are concerned—after their 12-hour surgical separation.
“I got a quarter of a lung now and he’s complaining?” Frank said between labored breaths. “This is bullshit.”
The most “testy” battle rages over control over their once-shared penis, which now dangles slightly to the left from the half of pelvis Frank was left with. Andrew, it seems, would still like to play with it on occasion in lieu of his new, 6-inch catheter tube.
“It’s just not fair.” Andrew said through tears. “Why couldn’t they give him the larger lobe of the liver and leave me the cock?”
“I thought we went over all this before the surgery.” Chief of Surgery Dr. Kyle Ostrander said. “The ‘cock,’ as Andrew calls it, was left up for grabs until I could get in there and examine the vasculature. Frank had the main vein. He gets the penis. It was that simple.”
The separation anxiety the brothers are experiencing is said to be normal. Both have agreed to counseling.