Monday, December 12

Local man pronounced dead inside.

Heath, OH - Medical personnel pulled the plug on treatment for Heath 43 year-old resident Stevie Johnson yesterday, pronouncing him emotionally dead inside.

“He never knew how to express himself.” His mother said. “For one reason or another he was just incapable of love.”

Stevie was a normal boy growing up, by all accounts. He liked music, collecting baseball cards, football and girls. Sometime around his 13th birthday, though, it was as if an internal switch had been flipped.

“His father left shortly after he was born, which wasn’t a problem until Stevie got to be a little older.” His mother continued. “He started acting out, misbehaving. And then there was that time he got raped by a camp counselor … that may have had something to do with this.”

“I plan to honor the memory of my brother’s emotional insides by living every day like it’s my own insides’ last.” Patrick Johnson said. “I’m also thinking about hosting a golf tournament or something to raise awareness about his dead insides.”