PACIFIC OCEAN - A barrier reef in the Pacific Ocean is coming to terms with the fact that it may never be Great.
"We've got one of those. Sorry" Oceanographers sent in a terse response to a petition received by the still just-ok barrier reef.
The reef submitted a cogent argument as to why it should take its rightful position at the top of the reef chain, listing "sheer size ... rather healthy coral system ... teeming with life ... and hardly polluted" as evidence of its greatness.
Later in the application the reef was so bold as to call itself "The Rainforest of the Sea."
"While we appreciate your application, and frankly marvel at your penmanship, we must decline your application at this time." the rejection letter continued. "Please reapply when the Great Barrier Reef is completely dead, which shouldn't be long now."
The reef without an adjective says it plans to reapply when global temperatures rise a bit more, bleaching more coral.
The Great Barrier Reef could not be reached for comment as it is out for repairs.
